VenusAtFar

I’ve started writing letters again…

Hello, Fos. 

I completely understand your sentiment. It is unnecessary. But always a possibility. I hate wars just as you do. Civilians are always a collateral damage. You know what I had this weird notion that after World War I and II which the world saw as devastating to millions, nations would no longer be fighting against each other and that they would strive to settle differences with talks. But no, they’d rather fight with their weapons to see who will yield to each other. I am no more educated regarding the choices that leaders make but I just hope there is a way to not engage in war at all. I think, wars are bound to happen.

I’d probably feel the same when I see the same poster branding a 20 year old as hero. Who would have known if he just wanted to be with his family instead of being in the frontlines of a war. I just wanted to know, before joining the war, were they really informed of what will they fight for? Was it explained to them fully? I don’t know, if you are going to lose your life, at least the state should give them the dignity of choice. Because to do otherwise would be compelete betrayal. Maybe branding him a hero is a consolation by the state. 

I want to support death penalty but the justice system here in our country is imperfect.

It should not be glorified but always a possibility, I believe. Countries don’t build nuclear weapons for no reason. 

Have you considered retiring in another country? 

You might not find your perspective fascinating but I do. Believe me I have never met someone as young as you who is so philosophical with life. I am not sure if it is a curse or a blessing being very conscious with the flow of time. 

Let me share a little (or not so little. haha) something about me. When I was younger, I was the type who will only deal with the hand laid in front of me. I only had dreams but no timelines really. I would only push through the directions of my dreams and would do what I have to do and let fate take me where I am supposed to be. My college classmates even have the exact age when are they going to marry. I didn’t have such so at this age I am unmarried. Haha. I know I wanted to be a lawyer but I didn’t know when because of financial constraints. It was a dream that had been tucked away and kinda forgotten but somehow life has been kinder and now I am in my fourth year. What I am trying to say is go in the direction of what you want. Do it with integrity. And who knows your destiny will come find you. Too optimistic? I don’t know. It’s maybe because I am a prisoner of hope.  

But you know nowadays, I can relate to your statement of becoming conscious of time. I find myself being just like that sometimes. Especially with being married. Some days, I become painfully aware of my age and my desire to have my own family. But then again, I would do what I have to do with integrity. 

Indeed. Emotions cannot be controlled. I used to think I could stop myself from falling. I was able to do that for so long. What terrifies me and makes me cry is the realization that if I let my guard down, someone would have the capacity to ruin me. I felt a pain that permeates the entire being when we ended things. So maybe, the next time I start to fall in love again, by the time I realize it, I would be crying. 

Oh thank you. Such a sweet thing to say. My last name is the Filipino translation of the word far, so my username is VenusAtFar. Seems apt since Venus is a far object from the Earth. Is your name really Fosbjorn? If not, what is your given name and what does it mean?

So far classes are about to resume. So I would be hella busy. But would try to reply as much as I can. Are you enrolled in a Japanese language class?

Take care,

Venus

“If we remove sexting, then we would be mere penpals.”

Those were the words of someone I once loved.

I remember how deeply they hurt because I had always believed that the moments we spent talking about his day, his passions, his culture, and the things that made him come alive were some of the most intimate parts of our relationship. To know that he saw those conversations as “mere penpals” made me wonder if we had been experiencing the same connection at all.

But what is so wrong about being penpals?

Writing letters feels different. It asks for patience in a world obsessed with instant replies. It asks for honesty when it would be easier to hide behind short messages. It asks for vulnerability because every letter carries a piece of the person who wrote it.

Today, we spend so much time trying to decode the meaning of a simple “okay” or wondering why someone left us on read. Letters leave less room for guessing. They are intentional. When you know someone may wait days before receiving your words, you choose them more carefully. You want them to be worthwhile.

I’ve been exchanging letters with people from different parts of the world, and I have never felt more seen.

They don’t skim past my thoughts. They respond to them. They remember the little things I shared. They ask questions. They engage with my hopes, my dreams, and even the ordinary moments of my life.

And in return, they share pieces of themselves.

Sometimes it’s a story about a childhood memory, a family tradition, a difficult season, or a dream they’re quietly holding onto. Sometimes their words make me laugh. Sometimes they leave me with tears in my eyes.

Because people are made up of stories.

And perhaps that is why letters feel so meaningful. They allow us to know another person not through carefully curated photos or fleeting conversations, but through the quiet unfolding of who they are, one story at a time.

Maybe that’s why I no longer believe being “mere penpals” is something lesser.

Sometimes, knowing another person’s story is one of the deepest forms of intimacy there is..

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